You are the newest mutants incubated in womb-speakers, the matrices of the Futurhythmachinic Discontinuum.
I have just now come from a gathering where I was the life of the party; witticisms flowed out of my mouth; everybody laughed, admired me -but I left, yes, the dash ought to be as long as the radii of the earth’s orbit________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________and wanted to shoot myself.
-Soren Kierkegaard, Journals & Papers V 5141 (Pap. I A 161) n.d., 1836
Anonymous asked: what do you think of the whole john campbell burning books thing?
i’m extremely reluctant to even appear to be speaking for a human being who has been spoken for enough today in many shameful, selfish, self-righteous, pious ways that would embarrass their speaker in any world less ridiculous than this one. it’s sad when people’s reaction to another human being’s [whatever] is to get angry that they arent getting some art.
art comes from human beings. under capitalism, art comes first, even if it kills the creator. very few people care about the health of those who make the art they consume.
or maybe their reaction is to discuss her for purposes that ultimately feed into social capital, whoops, i’m doing it, because the delineated system into which we have conveniently corralled our discourse is a system that harshly quantifies our most personal thoughts.
I really like the honesty of admitting that discussing our sexuality and humanizing ourselves on social media can mean the difference between survival and not-survival.
The idea that we, in some way, have to deserve to survive, have to be interesting enough to survive (survival is a word that elides the disgusting humiliation of survival—the stinking rotten throbbing jaw of untreated oral disease, having to beg friends and strangers for money, becoming trash-brained due to isolation and stress of doing what you have to do…)
I don’t believe the only marginalized people who deserve to survive are those who are interesting enough to appeal to an audience. Everyone deserves shelter and food and happiness regardless of how good they are at performing the emotional striptease of the alt-mind.
The ideas discussed in her recent post are interesting and valuable to me and resonate with my earlier misgivings and premonitions in recent years. I’m not interested in conflating these ideas with her as a person or somehow imagining I have any idea what’s going with someone I don’t know. You don’t know what’s going on with a person until you’ve been in their life. You don’t know how to care for them and show them justice.
Jumping to label someone’s actions as Magical Mental Illness Shit, even under the guise of caring about them, is disrespectful to their agency.
I like her antagonistic behavior toward webcomic creators. I had a strong emotional reaction to the post that left me feeling like ice and water all day. I think everything she’s done is saner than anyone judging her can possibly imagine. I think “meltdowns” (a term developed by a culture terrified of the gift of vision) can be a sign of great clarity and purpose. Something melts when it becomes less frozen and more flowing and adaptive.
Act surprised when you poison someone with a certain chemical their entire life until they start vomiting until they, in their “insanity”, desire to vomit and expel the poison they instinctively feel corroding their insides. Nausea is a physical form of insight.
I think many of the people judging her are struggling with serious spiritual problems that cause them to view her sane actions as insane.
Nausea is a physical form of insight